Back to School Blues

Back to School Blues

 

She won 1st place for the science fair last year!

Summer has gone so fast.  What happened?  I blinked and I missed it.
  This is a year full of changes for our family.  We have three children.  And with those three, full of energy kids, comes three different set of emotions for this mom.  I'm feeling overwhelmed with joy and sadness at the same time. 
  Our oldest who is 18 just graduated from High School this year and is moving onto to college.  It's a bittersweet thing.  He has his first car and his first bill.  That is stressful to him I know.  But he seems to be happy with his freedom and new opportunities.
  Our middle baby, is going to Middle School.  I hate to admit to her how terrified I am.  I used to work at this middle school and I recall so much fighting and drama.  Pre-teens with newly enraged hormones trying to figure out just "who" they are.  I am a nervous and protective mom to begin with and this does not feel enjoyable to me at all.  I will be a wreck everyday until she gets off of the bus.
  And our baby.  Oh my wee little baby.  We have had a rough year.  She was very sick this year and spent some time in ICU.  With all the medications, surgery and stress she lost most of her hair.  So, we start kindergarten and I worry that the children will tease her.  I know some kids can be mean but sometimes little children are the most tender and genuine people.  I'm hoping that she will do well.  I know that she is very excited to go to school.  Her screams of excitement and amazement when her book bag came in the mail yesterday gave me a small glimpse of her thoughts of school.
  Yet, with all of these changes for my children, changes are in store for me as well.  I work part time from home and I will actually be able to get in more productive hours.  But, I will be alone.  All day, alone.  For 18 years, I have been pretty much "on call" for my kids.  I know they will only be out of the house for a few hours, but, it will take some getting used to.  I mean, I won't know what to do in the restroom without someone banging on the door.  Or, hearing "mom, mom, mom, look at me" all day.  I will miss this phase of my life.  But, I do admit, that I am looking forward to what is ahead of us.  I may even find something new about myself in this bit of alone time.