My Mom/Wife Guilt
Guilt. Yes, I have guilt. Guilt over what?! Your a "stay at home mom"...what in the world do you have to feel guilty about?
Well.... I do get to stay at home...but I also work from home. I have blogged about this a lot. Many people assume because you are at home, that your house is spotless. Everything in it's place and a place for everything. Truth be told, that is just not how reality works. But I have hours that I have to log in for at work and it requires that I sit at the computer. I'm not able to get up here and there when I want...I have a shift like a regular job, it's just from home. So I sit at the computer and my mind goes through the mental list of all of the chores that need to be done, groceries that need to be purchased, meals that need cooked, dishes that need done....and then, I finish my shift and realize the children will be home soon. They will be starving and so will my husband. Rush to put a meal together, start some laundry, fold some laundry, work on homework...and then, Hubby arrives.
I know he looks around this house and thinks, what a lazy slob. What does she do all day?! So, yes, I feel guilt. In my mind, I should have it more together. I have great ideas...but, I'm just not living up to my own delusion. I think I'm supposed to be some super 50's wife. House spotless, makeup on and dressed all beautiful...and get in a full day of work.
Another thing is, I am lazy. Yes, I have to admit it...I'm lazy. Some of it is mental. What I mean by that is, when I look around and see all of the mess and dirt...I already feel exhausted and mentally shut down and just leave it at that. I feel defeated before I've even begun.
TODAY...TODAY...hoping TODAY I can pull it together. Before my shift for work, I'm trying to do some power cleaning. I've turned off the TV and turned the radio on. I've set a clock for speed cleaning of 15 minute blocks. I have to tell myself...it's OK. We are not doing a deep clean. We are doing a nice little clean and a pick up. I'm focusing on areas that my husband spends the most time in - our bathroom, bedroom and kitchen. So, here we go! Let me know how you get out of your rut of guilt and stress and plow through the mess!
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